I Left My Marks in San Francisco

Most of you know me as a developmental, protective, sensual Domme. Control through  guidance and inspiration, not humiliation, is my natural default in daily work and life. What you may not know is that there’s a hidden leather bitch who comes out to play on rare occasions, aroused by certain people and circumstances.

The most recent of these occasions was in San Francisco at the Academy of SM Arts Dominatrix Training 3-Day Pro Intensive in October. I’ve attended many educational activities and conferences since 2001, but have never experienced so much meaningful professional  development in one place. It was a privilege to learn from Dommes extraordinaire Cleo Dubois, Eve Minax, and Selena Raven; their volunteer bottoms; and my seven co-learners, who included a sleek blonde European Mistress, a devilish Midwestern girl next door, a dynamic young New Yorker, a long-time lifestyle player, and three other equally diverse and beautiful dominant women.

For our final scene on the last night, I became inspired by a masochistic bottom in a mummification bag and abruptly abandoned my slut training plans. Instead, I jumped onto the table and sat on his chest for some up-close CBT. Raw primal energy flowed from a place deep within as I disinterred him and continued to let loose. Nails. Teeth. Growling. Rope. Implements. Screams. Then I was spent, drenched in sweat. So was he. It was cathartic.

Sadism isn’t my set point, and I can’t flip that switch at will. But when it erupts… oh, my.

This trip was generously sponsored by P1, my free range pet, for whom handsome rewards are in store. He’s months overdue for some immobilization and sensory escape himself, but has been excused for good reasons.  While my patient, benevolent Goddess self has prevailed during this time, make no mistake, boy: the sadist waits quietly within. 

Kink Talk with Ms. Ava on SLS Radio

As a  recent guest on SLS (Swing Lifestyle) Radio, I had a blast sipping wine and chatting live with DJ Rick and his wife Brenda about some of my favorite things: crossdressing, kink, dominance, strap-ons, prostates, pain vs. sensation,  chastity, orgasm control, and more.

Want to hear my voice, learn a few things, and bear witness to Brenda’s gradual development and corruption?  Enjoy this partial recording, edited for length.

The Silence of the Diva

Darlings, please understand something… I don’t make regular blog and social media posts. But that doesn’t mean I’m idle.

I consciously try to savor my life and work, immersing myself in the  moment. My thoughts rarely turn toward documenting my experiences and thoughts for the  masses. Once that moment has passed and I’ve relished its juicy goodness, I’m off to the next thing.

Here’s my confession: The pressure to regularly report my activities and thoughts online makes me want to dig in my heels like a petulant child. Is it true that regular blog posts are  needed to prove that I’m active? Will adding more memes, cleavage pics, and links  to the digital clutter on social media really bring new friends to the Parlor who wouldn’t have found me otherwise?

Writing posts of value takes precious time, thought, and effort.  I  generally prefer to spend that time with other human beings, or in quiet reverie, or playing, or learning, or planning, or—best yet—immersed in a new experience or adventure. Because that’s what life’s about.

My Parlor Gurls, clients, and other friends are privy to those stories and thoughts—in person or on the phone. They offer the same to me.  I love sharing our lives and experiences that way. Person to person. Voice to voice.

But when it’s time to  stare at a keyboard, think of a topic, sort through pictures,  create a witty title, write and revise and revise some more, I grow impatient and become blocked. The older I get, the more I want to spend  each hour doing, seeing, feeling, and being—not displaying, not posing, not rehashing. I don’t crave mass adulation. Just caring and connection with an  intimate circle of Parlor Gurls, private clients, visitors, Blue Belles, partners, and friends. 

Is this lack of consistent posting bad for marketing? Conventional Wisdom says so—but I’ve found CV  to be an untrustworthy advisor. Is it selfish? Perhaps. I do have things of value to share. But I’m more driven to maximize the time I spend living, learning, reflecting, playing, adventuring, and making a personal difference to others.

I may come back and eat these words. Maybe someday Twitter and Instagram won’t turn my mental focus into shrapnel. Maybe someday I’ll outsource to someone who can prove ROI. Maybe I’ll become more patient with scrolling through pages of drivel in search of meaty information.

Sometimes I am inspired to post. When I feel like it. When I have something to say. Sometimes even in flurries. But not on a schedule.

Either way, I’m here. Maybe you should be, too. Schedule an appointment with me, in person or by phone, and together let’s create a new life-enriching experience of your own.


Save Money and Double the Fun with “Gal Pal” Sessions

Dress with a Friend!

Many gurls who visit me at the Parlor say they love getting gorgeous with another crossdresser—it’s always more fun! And doubling up can save you money.

Did you know I offer “Gal Pal” sessions? Bring a friend to dress or play together with me at a special rate. Both people must be screened and approved before booking.

“Gal Pal” Session Rates (total for 2 participants):

Type 1 (Let’s Be Girly):  $150/hour (Blue Belles members: $125/hour)

Type 2 (Playtime): Contact me to inquire.

Don’t have a friend to bring along, but still like being social? Join the Parlor Gurls to attend private “Gurl Time” sessions.





A Romp in the Dildo Farm

Before leaving Florida to head north, my dear friend Special K took a break to be silly while sorting toys for me.  I miss you, K!

Chastity Is About Harnessing the Knight

The best place for this key is between my breasts.

My attitude and approach toward female-led relationships (FLR) and dominance in my personal life is sometimes hard for men to understand when all they’ve seen (thank you, porn sites) is the more aggressive and demeaning variety. Just sharing this tidbit from a recent online conversation:

Him: I can see how breaking down an alpha male could be a turn-on for you. Obviously, chastity is a tool to make it all work, so you must enjoy that as well.

Me: I am not interested in “breaking down” an alpha male… it’s about harnessing the knight in him, allowing him the opportunity to be of service to, and cherished and owned by, a strong, smart, affectionate woman with high standards who’s invested in his personal development and self-actualization.

Chastity appeals to me not as a tool of subjugation, but as a tool for improvement in the male. Orgasm control and erotic energy play create biochemical reactions in the body that increase his worldly power, drive, and focus, and his attention to me…. and those are the things that turn me on. I enjoy the willing submission of strong and accomplished men, not weak, needy, indiscriminate, or broken ones.

In short, I like to feel tamed muscle between my legs. I have never felt the desire—or the need—to turn a thoroughbred into a mule, or a knight into a knave, to create one that is even stronger, more responsive, and well trained.

Home Is Where My Chastity Key Is

This afternoon I was catching up by phone with my friend Divinity Undenied (who also occasionally does double sessions with me at the Parlor) as her devoted husband/sub Richard chauffered her to happy hour.  When the topic turned to our mutual delight in chastity and orgasm control, she told me about these tshirts available through teespring.com.

Mugs and panties could also be fun. And shirts in pink.

Public humiliation, anyone?

Or worn as a proud statement to enlighten others about this “secret sauce” practice, capturing hearts and minds (and cocks)?

No matter. In either case, it works!

Pink nitrile gloves perfect for sissies

Come Here, You Little Sissy

Pink nitrile gloves perfect for sissies

Don’t you think pink is a perfect color for disposable gloves at the Parlor? I can’t bring myself to use anything else.

Ah, and that tasty crisp “snap” as I finish pulling them over my wrists! Like Pavlov’s dogs, some pets hear that sound and go all a-quiver in anticipation of delights in the rear near future. How I love to watch them wriggle!

Eyes on Ms. Ava: A Photo Shoot at the Parlor

Wonder what’s it like to watch a photo session at the Parlor? Here’s a first-hand account from NY sex blogger Ralph Greco, who graced the Parlor with his presence (as a voyeur, dammit) during a shoot one fine Saturday afternoon.  http://www.shortandsweetnyc.com/2018/01/the-sex-files-keeping-my-eyes-on-ms-ava-at-her-parlor/


Ms. Ava's foot among adult baby items

Nursery for a Day